According to some scientific studies, the cowgirl sex position is one of 2 most likely to lead women to penetration orgasms.
But even the best lovers, using the best positions, can make mistakes.
In fact, there’s one major mistake many men make in cowgirl that completely ruins a woman’s chance at reaching a climax.
On this page, you’re going to learn exactly what this costly mistake is, why we make it, and most important, what to do instead so that you can make your woman come every time.
Or more accurately, so that you don’t prevent your woman from making herself come on you.
But before we get to that…
Here’s how the cowgirl position works.
You lie on your back while your woman gets on top and rides you to bliss.
Like most sex position, there are many different variations of the cowgirl.
Which one you use is not a matter of what you’re in the mood for, rather what will lead your woman to orgasm.
Well get to that in a minute, but first…
Let’s get to the single most important thing you need to know about cowgirl, and virtually every woman on top position.
The Biggest Mistake Men Make In The Cowgirl Sex Position Is: Fucking From Below
Here’s the deal…
The type of penetration that makes men come, typically doesn’t do the job for women.
What’s needed for men to orgasm is a simple and consistent in and out motion.
For women, that motion doesn’t do much other than tease and eventually frustrate them.
Going straight in and out doesn’t make you rub against her clit, g-spot, or a-spot.
Unless you’re huge, she won’t feel much at all.
And if you are bigger than average, she’ll only feel a fraction of the pleasure she could.
When a woman gets on top to ride, her natural instinct will be to grind you.
Why?
Cause that’s the type of motion that makes her come.
The mistake so many men make is that once she starts grinding, we grab onto her and start fucking from the bottom.
We hold her in place and start pounding straight in and out.
Imagine how frustrating this is for women.
She gets on top and has full control.
She starts grinding in the way that feels incredible to her and will eventually bring her to orgasm.
But all of a sudden, the guys she’s on top of grabs her and starts penetrating in a completely different way.
A way that feels nowhere near as good as what she felt when she was in control.
How do you think that makes her feel?
- She feels like he’s taking pleasure away from her. This breeds resentment.
- He doesn’t understand what she wants and needs. This breeds a lack of trust.
- She’s not getting the pleasure she knows is possible. This makes her feel frustrated.
- She feels like he doesn’t care about pleasing her and is only using her for his pleasure.
Now think about it…
How likely do you think she is to want sex with him again.
In fact, you don’t have to imagine.
Take a look at this reddit user who posted about her frustration with guys who don’t let their woman ride.
And here’s another with some equally insightful responses from other women…
The bottom line is, when your woman gets on top, let her get off on you.
Keep your hips and pelvis still.
Now this does NOT mean you should play the role of a dead fish.
On the contrary.
Here’s What To Do In The Cowgirl Sex Position
Many women get insecure and nervous when on top.
Unlike the majority of positions, when she’s on top, she feels an added pressure to perform.
Add to this the fact that many women have never been able to find the motion that feels best for them.
Either she doesn’t know exactly what to try, or her past lovers were making the mistake we talked about earlier and didn’t allow her to try.
What you’re left with is a woman who doesn’t know exactly what to do and on top of that, she isn’t confident in her ability to do it without interference.
Your mission in cowgirl is twofold:
- Allow and encourage her to discover what feels best
- Reward her with positive reinforcement when she does so
When guys first hear me say “encourage her to discover what feels best”, they often think that just telling their woman “do whatever feels right to you” will do.
The problem is that she might not know what feels best or know how to figure it out.
Below, I’m going to show you what’s most likely to feel best to her and how to encourage her with your words as well as your actions.
Woven into each move, I’m going to give you some advanced techniques to reward her for doing so.
Here’s a hint: the most effective rewards have little to do with the words you use.
So let’s get to it.
Cowgirl Position for Clitoral Orgasms
Her position: She leans on your chest (as if she’s hugging you).
Ideal motion for her orgasm: A twerking motion that slides her clit up and down against your shaft and/or pubic bone.
Encourage her to find her bliss: It’s quite simple in this position. If she’s on her knees, there isn’t much she’ll be able to do other than twerk.
Reward her: Since your heads are so close together, you’re in the perfect position to use some dirty talk. Hold her close to you and tell her how much you love the way she moves her ass on you.
Cowgirl for Clitoris and A-Spot (AKA Deep-Spot) Stimulation
Her position: She gets upright with a slight lean and places her hands on your chest (as if giving cpr).
Ideal motion for her orgasm: Keeping you all the way inside while grinding herself back and forth, rubbing her clit against your pubic bone.
Encourage her to find her bliss: Again, if she’s on her knees, she should be able to figure out her ideal motion quite easily. If she doesn’t, put your hands on her hips and tilt them back and forth. Imagine grabbing a keyboard by the sides. Hold it straight up. Now tilt it slightly and then return to starting position. This is the motion you want to make.
Reward her: Once she nails the movement and is really enjoying it, know that she’s moving for her pleasure. Make her feel confident in her moves and get her to focus on her pleasure by telling her to. Say “You look so sexy the way you ride me. Use that cock, baby. Get that pleasure. Fuck yeah baby, get it!”
Cowgirl Sex For G-Spot Orgasms
Her position: She gets on top and leans back, putting her hands on your knees, thighs, or the bed.
Ideal motion for her orgasm: Imagine her staying completely still while tilting her pelvis up and down. Each time, she basically drops her g-spot on your tip.
Try this version lying down, and also try it sitting up in a couch or against the head of the bed. It’ll put your shaft at an angle and make g-spot stimulation even more dramatic.
Encourage her to find her bliss: When she’s on top, just tell her how sexy it would look if she leans back for a bit.
Reward her: Again, tell her how sexy she looks when she rides you. Moan, groan and let her know not just with your words, but also your sounds and facial expressions.
Keep in mind this position is tough and she likely wont be able to last very long.
If you’re close enough, try putting your arms around her and giving her that extra support to make her last a bit longer.
Cowgirl For Your Pleasure
Her position: She squats on top of you and bounces up and down on your cock.
Ideal motion: If she’s doing this version, it’s all about your pleasure. She’s going to be squatting up and down on your cock so she won’t get much in terms of physical pleasure but you will.
Just know that she’s unlikely to come in this version but if she keeps going long enough, you will.
If she’s already come in another version or position, this can be a fun way for you to finish.
The Betty Rocker
The betty rocker is a reverse cowgirl sex position which provides completely different types of stimulation.
Use the same principals of letting her find the ideal motion for her pleasure and use positive reinforcement.
The real key to making this position great for her is to make her feel confident about her ass.
Slap her it and let her know how sexy it looks.
Let her know how hard she’s making you.
Since she can’t see you or your facial expressions, get a little louder with your words and sounds.