Woman On Top

Lap Dance Sex Position – How To Let Her Seduce Herself

If you want to learn how your woman comes, watch what she does when she gets on top. The exception to this is when she’s in a service-top moves such as the lap dance sex position.

Wait…

What’s A Service Top Position?

Traditional girl-on-top positions (like cowgirl) are highly educational because you can relax and observe how your woman moves in order to orgasm. You can feel and watch the precise motion, rhythm, and speed she uses in order to get herself off.

Service-top positions are different because your woman doesn’t move in ways that will make her come. She moves in ways that *she thinks* will make you come. Or in ways she thinks will tease, please, and turn you on. She’s on top and in full control but she doesn’t use that power to pleasure herself, she uses it to pleasure and service you.

As you’ll learn in Penetration Orgasms Made Easy, the type of fucking that makes men come is very different from the type that makes women come.

So, if the lap dance sex position isn’t useful at teaching you what makes your woman come, what is it good for? The answer is turning her on and priming her for stronger orgasm in other positions.

Here’s why.

Nothing Turns Her On More Than Turning You On.

The only reason a woman gives you a lap dance (other than cold hard cash) is to turn you on. It’s to get you thinking with your little head instead of your big one. Why does she want to have this power? Because it makes her feel sexy, beautiful, and wanted.

So give her those feelings.

Make her feel beautiful, sexy, and wanted, by giving her the rise she’s trying to get out of you. When she sees (and feels) that her seductive moves are working, it makes her confident, wet, and liberates her to do all the nasty things you want without feeling any shame or guilt.

When she gets on top and gives you a lap dance:

Stroke and caress every inch of her body.
Compliment the way she moves.
Let out NON-EXAGERAATED moans and groans of pleasure and arousal.

A Quick Warning On The Danger of Trying To Get A Rise Out Of You

Have you ever been with a woman and taken her moans, groans, and movements as a sign to go harder, faster, or deeper… only to have your change in pace absolutely butcher her mood?

The same thing can happen here.

If you’re doing a great job of letting her know she’s turning you on, she might feel the urge to crank things up a notch.

As I said a minute above, the type of fucking that makes men come is usually very different from the type that makes women come. When You Watch Penetration Orgasms Made Easy, I’ll Show You That Difference. If a woman gets on top of you in the lap dance sex position and starts going in the way most likely to make you come (fast, full length, and hard), it could be very dangerous. One tiny slip and you could be in prime position for a major accident.

So make sure to keep the lap dance sex position going at a safe pace where the risk of an accident is reduced as much as possible.

If she does get too excited, grab a hold of her by the waist, hold her back, and tell her to slow down.

Pro Tip: Telling her that she’s making you too excited can fuel her confidence but telling her that SHE is getting too excited gives you a great segue to switch into a more dominant position where you can safely take back control of the thrusting.

So let’s get to it…

Variations of The Lap Dance Sex Position

As with all positions, there are many different versions. Here are a few of the most common your woman might try and what you can do to level up on them.

Champagne Room Position

This is the closed leg version of the lap dance where she’ll feel the tightest. It’s extremely difficult (if not impossible) to get into so she might have to spread her legs at first, get in position, and then close her legs once you’re inside.

In my experience, most women opt for a subtle grind instead of bouncing up and down. Match this pace by ‘hugging’ her from behind, putting your arm around her neck, or placing a hand on her pubic bone and applying a bit of pressure.

This is the ultimate “trying to turn you on” version so remember to encourage her and help her feel successful. Breath and moan, whisper in her ear how much she’s turning you on, and let her know how sexy her body feels as you caress every inch of it.

Reverse Lap Dance

This version is so good at making women come, that it made it onto my top 3 g-spot positions article.

As the name suggests, it’s similar to the regular lap dance only your woman is facing you instead of facing away. She puts her feet on the couch on each side of your butt and rocks her pelvis up and down.

If she leans back while doing this move, she’ll “drop” her g-spot directly onto your shaft, making her come fast and hard. The key here is that she will need some support to hold that position. She can put her hands on your thighs, you can wrap your arms around her waist and back, or she can hold up on a table or other furniture.

Spread Lap Dance Sex Position

Unlike the previous version where she keeps her legs closed tight, this version has her legs spread wide and open to all kinds of extra stimulation. This version actually can be all about her pleasure and making her come if you aren’t intimated by a little extra help.

Yup, I’m talking about using a toy or your hand to give her clitoral stimulation while she sits relatively still on your cock. You can actually make her come quite easily while you’re inside of her if you let your shaft sit still and let a toy do the work.

Swiss Ball Blitz Sex Position

Alright, this one is really more of a sex bucket list position for the very fit and sexually curious.

It’s lap dance on an exercise ball.

What more is there to say here other than BE EXTREMELY CAREFUL with this one. The risks we talked about above are even more present here so you might want to tell your woman not to pull off more then half way. The less length you’re working with, the more I would recommend you stay away from this version.

The Position Most Likely To Make Her Come

This entire blog is about studying different positions and finding the best ones for every scenario.

Depending on your size, your shape, how you and your woman “fit” with each other, some positions will naturally make her come more easily than others.

But there is one sex strategy that’s even more orgasmic than the positions you use.

Women from around the world agree it’s more important than the positions you use, your size, or even your stamina.

Use this 1 fucking technique and give any woman the most powerful orgasms of her life… guaranteed!

The Clapper Position – The Best Twerking Sex Position?

If watching women twerk turns you on, you’re going to love the clapper position.

If your girl likes shaking her ass, giving a show, and taking control, she’s gonna wanna try this one.

The clapper is similar to the reverse cowgirl only she has a much greater range in motion because of the variation in leg placement. This allows you to go much deeper.

You get the best view in the house. She gets the comfort of being on her knees without having to spread wider than the width of your hips.

To get into the clapper, just bend you knees slightly to let her legs go under yours.

You can get on your back, spread your legs, and let her scoot back onto you doggy style. Or she can get in doggy first, then you get on your back with legs spread, and scoot down.

Clapper All Star Play:

The clapper is a service top position, meaning it’s about your pleasure. Many women feel too self conscious in this position to truly enjoy it. When she can’t see your facial expressions and get positive reinforcement from your expressions, it’s easy for her to get in her head and start worrying about how her ass looks.

Take this opportunity to build her confidence and make her more comfortable having her ass in your face. Compliment her ass, the way she’s moving it, and how hard it’s making you. Fortunately, this position is great at keeping you hard. Because it bends your cock back slightly, it “pulls” on your erection and keeps it at attention.

Transitioning to a 69 or sliding out from under her and into a forbidden fruit pose because you just can’t resist her ass anymore will surely keep her confidence high.

Start by enjoying her ass. Telling her how sexy it looks in this position. Slap, grab, and caress her ass. Wet your thumb tip and rub her asshole without going in. Tell her how much you want to taste it, till the point you can’t take it anymore and need her to get into forbidden fruit to devour her.

If she’s really uncomfortable, she can always keep her panties and move them to the side just enough so you can slide in. It’ll give her rear some cover while she gets used to being in such a vulnerable position and you work on building her confidence.

If either of you need a break in the clapper, she can pull up off of you and give you a reverse foot job. AKA a sole job.

#1 Most Dangerous Mistake Men Make In The Cowgirl Sex Position

According to some scientific studies, the cowgirl sex position is one of 2 most likely to lead women to penetration orgasms.

But even the best lovers, using the best positions, can make mistakes.

In fact, there’s one major mistake many men make in cowgirl that completely ruins a woman’s chance at reaching a climax.

On this page, you’re going to learn exactly what this costly mistake is, why we make it, and most important, what to do instead so that you can make your woman come every time.

Or more accurately, so that you don’t prevent your woman from making herself come on you.

But before we get to that…

Here’s how the cowgirl position works.

You lie on your back while your woman gets on top and rides you to bliss.

Like most sex position, there are many different variations of the cowgirl.

Which one you use is not a matter of what you’re in the mood for, rather what will lead your woman to orgasm.

Well get to that in a minute, but first…

Let’s get to the single most important thing you need to know about cowgirl, and virtually every woman on top position.

The Biggest Mistake Men Make In The Cowgirl Sex Position Is: Fucking From Below

Here’s the deal…

The type of penetration that makes men come, typically doesn’t do the job for women.

What’s needed for men to orgasm is a simple and consistent in and out motion.

For women, that motion doesn’t do much other than tease and eventually frustrate them.

Going straight in and out doesn’t make you rub against her clit, g-spot, or a-spot.

Unless you’re huge, she won’t feel much at all.

And if you are bigger than average, she’ll only feel a fraction of the pleasure she could.

When a woman gets on top to ride, her natural instinct will be to grind you.

Why?

Cause that’s the type of motion that makes her come.

The mistake so many men make is that once she starts grinding, we grab onto her and start fucking from the bottom.

We hold her in place and start pounding straight in and out.

Imagine how frustrating this is for women.

She gets on top and has full control.

She starts grinding in the way that feels incredible to her and will eventually bring her to orgasm.

But all of a sudden, the guys she’s on top of grabs her and starts penetrating in a completely different way.

A way that feels nowhere near as good as what she felt when she was in control.

How do you think that makes her feel?

She feels like he’s taking pleasure away from her. This breeds resentment.
He doesn’t understand what she wants and needs. This breeds a lack of trust.
She’s not getting the pleasure she knows is possible. This makes her feel frustrated.
She feels like he doesn’t care about pleasing her and is only using her for his pleasure.

Now think about it…

How likely do you think she is to want sex with him again.

In fact, you don’t have to imagine.

Take a look at this reddit user who posted about her frustration with guys who don’t let their woman ride.

And here’s another with some equally insightful responses from other women…

The bottom line is, when your woman gets on top, let her get off on you.

Keep your hips and pelvis still.

Now this does NOT mean you should play the role of a dead fish.

On the contrary.

Here’s What To Do In The Cowgirl Sex Position

Many women get insecure and nervous when on top.

Unlike the majority of positions, when she’s on top, she feels an added pressure to perform.

Add to this the fact that many women have never been able to find the motion that feels best for them.

Either she doesn’t know exactly what to try, or her past lovers were making the mistake we talked about earlier and didn’t allow her to try.

What you’re left with is a woman who doesn’t know exactly what to do and on top of that, she isn’t confident in her ability to do it without interference.

Your mission in cowgirl is twofold:

Allow and encourage her to discover what feels best
Reward her with positive reinforcement when she does so

When guys first hear me say “encourage her to discover what feels best”, they often think that just telling their woman “do whatever feels right to you” will do.

The problem is that she might not know what feels best or know how to figure it out.

Below, I’m going to show you what’s most likely to feel best to her and how to encourage her with your words as well as your actions.

Woven into each move, I’m going to give you some advanced techniques to reward her for doing so.

Here’s a hint: the most effective rewards have little to do with the words you use.

So let’s get to it.

Cowgirl Position for Clitoral Orgasms

Her position: She leans on your chest (as if she’s hugging you).

Ideal motion for her orgasm: A twerking motion that slides her clit up and down against your shaft and/or pubic bone.

Encourage her to find her bliss: It’s quite simple in this position. If she’s on her knees, there isn’t much she’ll be able to do other than twerk.

Reward her: Since your heads are so close together, you’re in the perfect position to use some dirty talk. Hold her close to you and tell her how much you love the way she moves her ass on you.

Cowgirl for Clitoris and A-Spot (AKA Deep-Spot) Stimulation

Her position: She gets upright with a slight lean and places her hands on your chest (as if giving cpr).

Ideal motion for her orgasm: Keeping you all the way inside while grinding herself back and forth, rubbing her clit against your pubic bone.

Encourage her to find her bliss: Again, if she’s on her knees, she should be able to figure out her ideal motion quite easily. If she doesn’t, put your hands on her hips and tilt them back and forth. Imagine grabbing a keyboard by the sides. Hold it straight up. Now tilt it slightly and then return to starting position. This is the motion you want to make.

Reward her: Once she nails the movement and is really enjoying it, know that she’s moving for her pleasure. Make her feel confident in her moves and get her to focus on her pleasure by telling her to. Say “You look so sexy the way you ride me. Use that cock, baby. Get that pleasure. Fuck yeah baby, get it!”

Cowgirl Sex For G-Spot Orgasms

Her position: She gets on top and leans back, putting her hands on your knees, thighs, or the bed.

Ideal motion for her orgasm: Imagine her staying completely still while tilting her pelvis up and down. Each time, she basically drops her g-spot on your tip.

Try this version lying down, and also try it sitting up in a couch or against the head of the bed. It’ll put your shaft at an angle and make g-spot stimulation even more dramatic.

Encourage her to find her bliss: When she’s on top, just tell her how sexy it would look if she leans back for a bit.

Reward her: Again, tell her how sexy she looks when she rides you. Moan, groan and let her know not just with your words, but also your sounds and facial expressions.

Keep in mind this position is tough and she likely wont be able to last very long.

If you’re close enough, try putting your arms around her and giving her that extra support to make her last a bit longer.

Cowgirl For Your Pleasure

Her position: She squats on top of you and bounces up and down on your cock.

Ideal motion: If she’s doing this version, it’s all about your pleasure. She’s going to be squatting up and down on your cock so she won’t get much in terms of physical pleasure but you will.

Just know that she’s unlikely to come in this version but if she keeps going long enough, you will.

If she’s already come in another version or position, this can be a fun way for you to finish.

The Betty Rocker

The betty rocker is a reverse cowgirl sex position which provides completely different types of stimulation.

Use the same principals of letting her find the ideal motion for her pleasure and use positive reinforcement.

The real key to making this position great for her is to make her feel confident about her ass.

Slap her it and let her know how sexy it looks.

Let her know how hard she’s making you.

Since she can’t see you or your facial expressions, get a little louder with your words and sounds.

2 Keys To Blow Her Mind In The Pearly Gates Sex Position

The pearly gates sex position gives your woman the control of cowgirl, with the closeness of missionary.

It might look difficult and not worth the effort but enough women swear by it that it’s definitely worth a try, at least once.

Think of it like spooning, while facing the ceiling.

Lie flat on your back, lift and spread your legs, bending them at the knees and placing the souls of your feet flat on the bed.

She gets on top with her legs spread and bent with souls on the bed for balance.

It’s a position that offers g-spot and p-spot stimulation.

If she’s not completely comfortable being exposed to you or letting you watch as she plays with herself, the pearly gates allows her to do so without you seeing. It’ll increase her comfort gradually, which is key.

Many women say this position makes them squirt quite easily. If she’s a squirter, it’s all the more reason to give this one a shot.

As mentioned, her balance is key in this one. By keeping your legs spread and grounded, she has a solid foundation to lie on.

To increase her balance, she should spread her legs and place them on the ground as well. She can also stretch her arms out to her sides and put her hands on the bed.

2 Secrets To Mastering The Pearly Gates Sex Position

There’s really 2 keys to making this position incredible for her.

Let her do the thrusting.

You can thrust from the bottom and some women will like it, most don’t.

Why?

Cause she knows the best way to move in order to git her O spot. She will instinctively move in the right way. She might grind, gyrate, pump up and down, or one of many other options.

If you start taking control from the bottom, you don’t let her find her rhythm.

So let her do her thing and instead of trying to fuck from below, focus on how you…

Use your hands.

Sounds simple but this really is the key to making this position mind-melting for her.

You’ve got full access to all her naughty bits. And it’s coming from an unconventional angle.

It’s a totally different sensation.

Play with her boobs.

Put your hand around her neck.

Rub her clit. (She can even stop thrusting for a bit and stay still while you rub her to orgasm!)

Smack her ass from the sides.

If you are doing the thrusting, grab onto her hips. It’ll make her subconscious flex her vaginal muscles and come even harder!

Grab a handful of hair and pull her head to one side (carefully of course). Kiss and nibble her neck.

Silence Is Death In This Position

Silent sex is always awkward, but when your mouth is right by her ear, it becomes even more noticeable and important.

So get close up to her ear and talk to her.

Moan and groan to let her hear your excitement.

Breathe naturally and let your mouth make whatever noises feel natural.

Make noises that let her know how much she’s turning you on.

Variations of the Pearly Gates

As with all positions, you’ll want to try out slightly different tweaks to find out what works best for you.

Remember, not all women are the same and you need to split test to get the best results.

Here are a few versions worth trying.

Test legs spread wide vs tight.

3 Different Variants of Leg Positioning that will Change the Stimulation

If her legs are spread wide, you’ll go deeper inside of her.

As guys, we tend to assume this is best but it doesn’t always hit that perfect o-spot, especially if you’re bigger than average.

By spreading your legs and having hers closer together, she will feel tighter and you’ll feel fuller inside of her. Apart from losing a bit of depth, she’ll also have less balance. Keep this in mind and make sure she doesn’t tumble over.

If her legs spread wide works best, the next question is does she prefer her legs spread wider than yours (on the outside), or less (on the inside)?

Kneeling Gates

This is another version that looks hard and not worth the effort at first glance but once again, many women swear by this tweak so it just might be worth trying.

Personally, I don’t bother with this version unless she initiates it.

Arched Gates

Here she bends her legs fully, plants her feet flat on the floor and uses her leg muscles to hold her lower body.

While resting her upper body on top of you, she can grind away while you lay back and enjoy.

She’ll have the most control over movement and motion.

Just know that she’ll get tried quickly here and keep an eye out for cues so that you’re ready to switch it up.

Transitioning in and out of The Pearly Gates Sex Position

It’s highly unlikely that your woman will just tell you to lie down and then get on top in the pearly gates.

This is a position that’s typically transitioned into from other positions.

Also remember that how you change positions will determine if you come across as smooth and natural in bed.

Here are a few of the best transitions for the pearly gates.

Split Sinner

This one could have been put under a variation but it is a transition if you’re feeling extra adventurous and want to try the full nelson.

From the basic version, just lift her legs a bit and get a hold of them.

She won’t be able to do any thrusting here so that’s going to be on you.

Spooning Sex Position

I started this article by telling you how the pearly gates is like spooning on your back.

All you have to do is tilt your body to a side and she’ll fall over in a spoon position.

Couldn’t be easier.

This is also the first step if you’re trying to transition into one of the all time greatest positions, the prone bone.

Give her a bit of slower, love-making in the spoon first, then flip her all the way over to drill her hard in the prone bone!

Do NOT Use The Full Nelson Sex Position Unless She Does This…

It’s fairly popular in porn cause it makes for a great camera view, but the full nelson sex position is one I suggest you stay away from except for 1 very specific situation… more on that below.

First, here’s how it’s done.

You typically start out in reverse cowgirl. Transition into the Pearly Gates. Then she folds her legs towards her head.

You reach your arms under her knees and then back up behind her head, putting her into a “head & leg lock”. If you can reach, join your hands together and interlock your fingers.

Lift your legs slightly and bend them at the knees putting the soles of your feet flat on the bed. Now thrust from the bottom while holding her in place.

Why You Should NOT Use The Full Nelson Sex Position

Below you’ll learn the 1 instance where this can be a great and useful position. First, here are a few of the reasons why it’s usually a bad position for most situation.

It’s not easy to pull off.

She’s got to be bendy. She needs the flexibility to bend her legs far back enough that you can hug them and still reach far enough to put your hands on her head.

You also have to worry about balance. All of her body weight is on top of yours and falling over to one side or the other is all too easy. So if you are going to try the position, take a second to figure out your balance before you start thrusting.

The fact that her entire body weight is lying on top of you can be uncomfortable and restrict your breathing.

It can throw her off the path to orgasm psychologically.

Distraction kills women’s orgasms. In order for a woman to orgasm, she’s got to be in the moment and focused on the physical sensations of pleasure. If she’s worried about the bills, what you think of her, or feeling pressured to orgasm, it’s not going to happen.

Getting into the full nelson curls her lower body and “smashes” her belly together. In other words, it’s going to create those rolls on her tummy. Even if she’s really fit, a curled belly creates those pouches that no one likes to see.

Also, because your hands are behind her head, it’s going to tilt her head forward and what’s in her direct line of sight?

Those distracting belly rolls.

Now she’s focused on something she doesn’t like about her body instead of focusing on fun and pleasure. It’s almost guaranteed to ruin her orgasm.

It Doesn’t Give Her What She Needs

If you read my other blog posts, you know that I’m vehemently against “fucking from the bottom” because all it ends up doing is messing up her grove.

When a woman gets on top, she will ride in the perfect motion required to reach orgasm. If you pay attention in bed, you’ve likely noticed that “perfect motion” is NOT going straight in and out… like most guys do. So let her find her ideal motion and then ride you to orgasm.

The full nelson is different because she can’t do any thrusting. Also, as you’re about to see, one of the only times I suggest you try this position is if she needs deep and fast thrusting in order to orgasm.

Click here to learn the 3 Best Sex Positions for female orgasms.

The Only Time You Should Use The Full Nelson Sex Position

So now that you know why you shouldn’t use this position, it’s time to go over why you should. Or more accurately when you should.

Obviously you want to try this position if your woman asks for it specifically or if you’re both committed to checking every sex position off your bucket list.

But here’s the big one…

The only time I recommend the full nelson…

If you’re a regular reader, then you know how much I hammer on the fact that all women are different and you need to adapt your techniques to match your womans preferences.

When it comes to giving a woman orgasms, you generally find the technique that works best for her and keep going all the way to a climax.

Some women need you to increase the speed or pressure right at the end, some need you to keep doing the exact same thing…

But there are some women who just won’t cross the finish line unless you do something dramatically different when she’s nearing the peak.

If your woman is like this, then the full nelson sex position just might be the missing link to making her come.

If she rides you in cowgirl and manages to bring herself to the brink of orgasm but can never cross the finish line, it’s highly likely she needs something completely different right before her orgasm disappears.

This is the only time I recommend you try this position out.

BUT…

Even in that case, I wouldn’t recommend the full, full nelson.

Do the position as described above but only wrap your arms around her legs, not her head.

As we talked about, it can get her focused on her belly… and it’s just not very comfortable. It puts an uncomfortable (possibly even painful) strain on the neck to will distract her focus.

So try out the full nelson WITHOUT your hands behind her head and also check out some of the variations below.

Different Ways To Do The Full Nelson Sex Position

Oystered Nelson

This is a variation of both the full nelson and the Viennese Oyster.

Instead of putting your hands behind her head and creating the neck strain and inevitable view of her belly rolls, she’s the one who’s dictating just how much she wants to get into position.

If she’s already comfortable doing the Viennese oyster (sometimes referred to as the pretzel position), then this is just a matter of doing the pose while she’s lying on top of you instead of the other way around.

Think of it as the oyster but she’s on top instead of you.

The biggest challenge in this position will be for her to keep her balance so make sure you get that settled before you start thrusting.

Nelson’s Sandwich (Threesome Position)

Just as it sounds, this one is for a threesome. Use it with another guy or girl if one wears a strap-on.

One of you can enter her vagina while the other is in her ass, or you could both enter the same hole.

Just make sure she’s okay with it first.

A major benefit to this version is that the guy (or girl) on top can do all the thrusting while the guy (or girl) on the bottom stays in place. As long as the top giving is thrusting hard enough, it’ll rock your woman back and forth on you as well.

Dog Meet Nelson

It might look like something only possible in a hentai cartoon, but it is doable and can be fun to try.

Start in a standing doggy. Her feet flat on the floor, bent over at the waist, and hands on the ground.

As you stand behind her, bend forward and wrap your arms under the insides of her knees.

Once you’re confident it’s safe, reach all the way behind her head and slowly pick her up off the ground.

Standing Bully Nelson

This one is quite simple. It’s essentially the full nelson while standing without lifting her legs.

That said, since women are usually shorter than men, she will be lifted up off the ground. If she’s flexible enough, she can also wrap her legs around your legs.

Using this position for anal? It’ll be quite easy to pound back and forth.

But if you’re having vaginal sex, it’s a bit more tricky. She’ll need to tilt her hips so that you can enter her.

Enter her while in a standing position like standing doggy and then pick her up while you stay inside her.

It’s easier said than done but can make for quite the dominant experience.

Speaking of dominant…

The Choked Nelson

Some women just LOVE to sensation of being choked during sex.

WARNING: NEVER Choke her. I said many women like the sensation. They like the idea of it. They like the feel of a strong hand wrapped around her neck with a little bit of pressure. Creating the feeling is not the same as actually doing it.

Always be careful with choking.

Instead of reaching your hands behind your woman’s head, put your hands around her neck.

Make sure she has a way of giving you feedback. She needs some way of letting you know if it’s too much.

Obviously you can’t see her facial expression in this position. You might not be able to hear her say her safe word. And since her arms are “locked up”, she might not be able to give you a gestures. All this makes it that much more important that you establish some way of communicating when it’s too much.

So there you have it.

The full nelson sex position, why you should or shouldn’t use it, and a whole bunch of fun variations.

How To Use the Faceoff Sex Position to Make Her Fall In Love… HARD!

The faceoff sex position might not seem like much, but it’s one of the best positions for building intimacy and sexual trust.

If you’ve been reading this blog for a while, you already know that women are desperate to experience many different shades of the sexual rainbow.

I’m not talking about women wanting to get it on with other women, although that is a common fantasy.

What I’m talking about is giving your woman a variety of erotic emotions.

Women crave “dark emotions” like lust and uncontrollable desire… and they also crave light emotions such as feeling cared for, special, and loved.

IMPORTANT: In this context, I’m talking specifically about women who are in committed relationships.

If you’re just hooking up with a one night stand, there’s a high chance that she doesn’t want to feel the lighter emotions like love. She might even be afraid to experience them with you. Unless you know her O type and you know she needs light emotions to orgasm, going light with a one night stand is usually a turnoff. Stick to the dark emotions for one night stands and fuck buddies.

On the other hand, if you’re in a committed relationship with a woman you love, NOTHING will satisfy her more than a VARIETY of sexual experiences.

Sometimes she craves being tied her up, brought to the brink of orgasm, and then denied that orgasm at the last minute.

Sometimes she craves a spontaneous quickie in the car or kitchen.

Sometimes she craves being completely dominated and given a hard fucking.

And sometimes, she wants nothing more than to make sweet, slow, romantic love that penetrates her soul and fills her up with love and connection.

The faceoff sex position is one of the best positions for light-emotion sex.

Now that we’re clear on when you should and shouldn’t use this position…

Here’s How To Pull Off the Faceoff Sex Position

To get in the faceoff, sit down on a chair, the edge of a bed, a couch, or in a car. Only parked cars count!

Facing you, your woman sits and kneels on top of you.

It’s that simple.

The part where guys get hung up is when it comes to the thrusting.

How She Comes In the Face Off

A common mistake guys make whenever their woman gets on top is to grab onto her and start pounding really hard and fast from the bottom. Some women like this… but for most it just ruins her orgasm.

See the type of stimulation that makes a guy come isn’t the same type of stimulation that gets a woman off.

Straight in and out penetration gives us the friction we need to come but women need to have their clit, g-spot, or one of the deep spots stimulated.

Going straight in usually doesn’t do it for her. Unless you’re packing so much meat that Ron Jeremy would be jealous.

Any time your woman gets on top, let her move and grind in the way that works best for her, or give her some time to find that perfect motion and then take control only if and when you can mimic it perfectly.

In the faceoff, you won’t be able to “thrust back” since your ass is stuck to a surface.

That’s a good thing.

Let her take control.

Let her ride.

Let her come.

Most likely she’ll find that one of these 2 motions works best for her:

Grinding you so that your pubic bone rubs against her clit.
Rocking back and forth (slightly) so that the tip of your penis rubs against one of her deep spots.

In the latter version, it won’t feel like she’s doing much at all. In fact many guys who don’t understand what she’s doing might get frustrated and impatient, longing for some in and out action.

But you know better.

You understand that those seemingly minute movements have a powerful effect inside of her.

Use The Faceoff Sex Position To Build Intimacy & Sexual Trust

In the beginning of this article I mentioned how women crave a variety of sexual experiences and emotions.

One of the keys to using giving your woman variety is to make sure everything is congruent.

When using a light position and thrusting style, don’t pull her hair and use raunchy dirty talk.

When fucking her hard in doggy, don’t talk in a low voice and tell her how much you love her.

Keep everything congruent.

Got it?

Since the face off is best for light love making, add in congruent “bonuses”.

Side note: oxytocin is known as the love hormone. Our brains produce more of this hormone when making love and when our bodies are so close and pressed up against each other.

Keep it congruent and amplify oxytocin production by:

Looking deep into each others eyes.
Whispering sweet nothings into her ear.
Having her wrap her arms around your neck while you wrap yours around her waist and hold her close.
Passionately kiss her lips, her neck, and her breasts.
Get present and FEEL YOUR BODY while you’re inside her. Mirror neurons ß find science link – will fire and she’ll start to do the same. When she does, you’ll feel each other on a deeper, almost spiritual level. I know it sounds corny, but trust me… nothing will make her feel more loved, special and connected.

Transition Positions

Finally, as I always try to cover in the blogs, make sure you transition smoothly from one position to the next.

Here are 2 simple yet powerfully effective transitions from the faceoff.

Cowgirl

Not much to this one. Just lean back, let her make the adjustments necessary and then ride you to orgasm.

transitioning into cowgirl — Faceoff to Cowgirl transition

Reverse Lap Dance

While you stay in the same position, tell her it would be really hot if she leaned back.

By doing this, it’ll position her g-spot directly above your penis head. With just a bit of movement, she’ll quickly realize that she can “drop” her g-spot directly onto you for incredibly pleasurable penetration.

You can easily reach over and play with her boobs or clit for that extra boost in pleasure.

Watch The 67 Ways To Make Women Come

Use the Betty Rocker Sex Position when She Needs A Good Spanking

A woman will sometimes act out in hopes you’ll give her a much deserved spanking. When done in the right context, many women love (even yearn for) a good spanking. The Betty Rocker Sex Position is one of those contexts.

It’s similar to reverse cowgirl only she’s on her knees and leaning forward.

Another way to think of it is that she gets into a doggy style position, while you lie down underneath her.

Put some a few pillows under your head and you’ve got a view any “ass man” would kill for.

If your hips are too wide or this version simply isn’t comfortable, spread your legs, lift your hips and place them on the outside of her legs.

Here’s what you need to know in order to make this position as pleasurable and orgasmic as possible.

Let Her Take Charge in the Betty Rocker Sex Position

Unlike most rear entry positions, she gets to call the shots in this one. She’s in total control of the rhythm, angle, speed, and depth. Let her have this gift. DO NOT try to fuck her from the bottom… unless she specifically asks for it. Men and women don’t typically orgasm from the same type of thrusting. So let her thrust in the way that feels best for her… or… tell her how to thrust for your pleasure. She can rock back and forth, grind you, or even twerk on your cock. She can go fast, slow, or mix it up.

Once she has found something that works for her, amplify her emotions by telling her she loves it. Saying things like “you love bouncing on my cock like that don’t you baby?” or, if she’s doing more of a grinding motion “you love grinding on my cock like that don’t you baby?”. If you can do it without messing her grove, put your hands on her hips and pull her onto you… but only if you can stay in sync with her movements!

Spanking Sex

If ever there was an ideal position for spanking, this is it. When spanking your woman’s bottom, you want to aim for the most center part of it. This is where there’s the most fatty tissue. Avoid the sides of her butt. They have less fat and will lead to pain rather than pleasure. Start with lighter spanks and ask for feedback. Between spanks, lightly rub her butt in circles to soothe & heighten the sensation.

Clitoral Stimulation in the Betty Rocker Sex Position

When it comes to clitoral contact, the Betty Rocker doesn’t provide it naturally (like other positions). If your girl needs clitoral stimulation to get off, you’re going to need some help in order to make it happen in this position. Thankfully, I’ve got a couple of suggestions for you. Put on a vibrating cock ring with the vibrator on the bottom of your shaft. Right on your balls. When you’re fully inside her, she’ll have that sucker right on her clit! This works best when she stays completely on you and grinds her pelvis. The vibrator will be sandwiched between your balls and her clit. Either of you can also hold a vibrator in the same place.

G-Spot Stimulation

If g-spot stimulation is what she’s going after, she’ll have the best results by arching her back at sticking her butt up high in the air.

Deep Posterior Stimulation

We all know about the g-spot and the a-spot (sometimes called the deep spot), but most men (and even women) don’t know about the posterior fornix (sometimes called the cul-de-sac). It’s on “the other” wall of the vagina and produces INTENSE pleasure and orgasms. While most women never find this spot without the help of a very specialized toy or advanced lover, the Betty Rocker position can help her discover it. In order to make it more likely she’ll find it, use a sex wedge or pillow under your butt to tilt your pelvis. BTW if she really likes this, she’s much more likely to be open to anal penetration, or at least some light anal play.

Speaking of such things…

Anal Play in the Betty Rocker Sex Position

If you’re both into anal, the Betty Rocker is a great position for it.

If your woman isn’t into full on anal penetration but does like a little anal play, you’re in for a treat! Since her ass is right there in front of you, it’s an easy opportunity to tickle her fancy while she rides you to bliss.

Wet the tip of your thumb and lightly rub it in circles on her anus. Notice I said ON and not IN. Just the light rub of a wet finger or thumb pad will feel exquisite.

If she does like a little penetration, insert the tip of your thumb, finger or use a small toy or anal plug. You’ll give her one of the most common female fantasies, double penetration, without having to share you woman with some other dude. Unless of course that’s what you’re into.

Don’t Forget To Compliment Her Ass

Finally, make sure you compliment her ass. Other than the Betty Rocker sex position, there aren’t many others that exposes a woman’s ass as much so make sure you make her feel good and confident about it. It doesn’t matter if she knows it, or you tell her all the time how great her ass is… women thrive on compliments and need them regularly. So let her know just how incredible her ass is!

Reverse Lap Dance Sex Position Delivers Intense G-Spot Orgasms

If you want to give your woman a powerful, g-spot orgasm during penetration, the reverse lap dance sex position is likely your best bet.

In this girl-on-top twist, you sit on a chair or couch, your woman gets on top, facing you, and leans back.

Here’s exactly how to do it.

Tell her to sit on your lap.

In the beginning, you might hold her close with an arm wrapped around her.

It’ll be slow and intimate because she won’t have a great range in motion, but you’ll be up close and face to face.

Spend a little time sweet talking and building a connection.

Here’s how to take it to the next level and really make her come.

If she isn’t already, have her kneel, or place her feet in front of her, on the outside of your body.

Tell her how hot it would be for her to lean back.

She can put her hands on your thighs, or a (very stable) table behind her for support.

Now just sit back, enjoy, and wait for her to jizz all over you!

Why does this position work so well?

In most positions, guys thrust straight in and out.

If you’re well hung, this simple back and forth movement can be enough to make a woman erupt in orgasm.

But for those of us who are average (or below) in size, we need to make sure we’re hitting the right spots.

To find a woman’s most common “orgasm zone” the g-spot, pretend she’s laying down, on her back, then go in and up.

In this version of the reverse lap dance position, the angle is created naturally because she’s leaning back.

How to take the reverse lap dance sex position to the next level

This is really simple but can easily double the intensity and pleasure for your woman.

Because she’s leaning back and creating an opening between your bodies, use one hand to play with her clit.

You can place your palm on her pubic bone with your thumb pointed down (on her clit), or you can place the back of your hand against her pubic bone and use the insides of your fingers to lightly squeeze her clit while massaging it up and down.

Which version you use shouldn’t depend on what you prefer, rather it should depend on what she comes from.

Not sure exactly what finger moves make her come? Watch this video to find out.

Stimulate her body and mind for the most intense orgasm possible.

In any female orgasm, there are 2 dual factors needed to make it happen.

She needs the right physical stimulation (like we just discussed)
She needs the right psychological stimulation

In this position, her tiddies are up close and right in front of you, there for you to inspect and judge.

If she’s got any insecurities about them (like many women do), then she might be worried about how they look so up-close and this can distract her from orgasm.

So make sure you give her lots of positive reinforcement and compliments.

Tell her how sexy she looks when she leans back.

Oogle her body and let her see your satisfied, yet hungry grin.

Kiss, play with, and admire her sexy body.

Another insecurity many women have is about their performance.

A lot of women don’t orgasm because they’re not confident in their skills. Many women worry they can (or don’t) fuck well.

Paradoxically, some women are also shy and hesitant to perform too well in fears that you’ll think she’s a slut.

So make sure that you don’t only compliment her body, but also her sexual expression.

As she gets into it, say “You love riding my cock don’t you baby.”

Notice I didn’t put a question mark at the end.

Why?

Cause you’re not asking a question.

If you said “Do you love riding my cock?” you’re asking her logical brain to think about it. This is the last thing you want.

By slightly changing your tone, you’re telling her that she does in fact love it and her only option is to agree.

Since you’re giving her so much pleasure by hitting her g-spot, her verbal agreement is only going to reinforce the pleasure and make her more comfortable riding you.

Amazon Sex Position – Pinnacle of Role Reversal

Men: If you’ve ever wanted to get banged without having a dildo shoved up your butt… you need to try the amazon sex position!

Women: If you’ve ever fantasized about how powerful you’d feel pounding your man, the amazon is for you!

The amazon position is one of the most challenging you’ll ever try. Both physically and emotionally.

In this advanced, woman-on-top position, the man lies on his back with his legs spread, while the woman towers over him and does the bump and grind.

She thrusts.

She dominates.

She runs the show.

This spiced-up cowgirl is role-reversal at its finest.

The man must be comfortable enough to get into such a submissive position and “get fucked”, while some women can find it difficult to take charge and dominate.

In terms of physical challenges, the man must be flexible and the woman needs endurance.

The 2 keys to this position are to get in the right mindset, and find the ideal variation of the position.

Step 1. Ease into role reversal gradually

If the man is used to being dominant, it can be a challenge to let go and be the submissive.

The easiest way to do this is for the woman to start taking the lead in less dominant ways.

Tell your man to lie down.

Tie him up.

Give him a lap dance.

Show him (through your actions) that you’re in charge and it’s okay for him to submit to his goddess.

Get on top of him and rub yourself against his manhood.

Ask him “Who’s cock is this?”

If he tries to enter himself into you, grab you, or take control in any way, slap his hand away and let him know you’re in charge!

Before you start to penetrate him, take a moment to get present and really feel the shift in power dynamic.

You might start with a dominant blowjob while you pin his arms down.

Don’t blow him like you usually would.

Instead, fuck him with your mouth.

Show him how much pleasure he can experience when you take control.

Step 2. Find your ideal version of the position

There are lots of variations to the Amazon sex position.

Some are more challenging than others…

Some will hit the right spot just perfectly…

And some will have you falling over.

Keep testing and tweaking until you find the one that works for the two of you.

Here’s something you must keep in mind when testing out new variations.

This position can put a tremendous amount of strain on your guys Penile Suspensory Ligamant (PSL).

Too much strain and it could tear, putting him out of commission for months.

So please, BE CAREFUL and always be conscious of his angle.

In this first variation of the man’s position, you can see that his cock is straight up.

This is as far back as he can comfortably go.

Now take a look at what happens (in the second image) when his pelvis is tilted with the help of a prop such as a pillow or his hands.

If the prop is placed under his butt, his pelvis tilts towards his face.

His erection can’t go as far back but this could be much more stimulating for you if you’re going to be leaning over him.

If the prop is placed under his lower back (see the third image), it makes the pelvis tilt away from his head and his erection can go back further.

This version might be ideal if the woman is going to face away from him.

Again, the key is to find your ideal version and always be conscious (and careful) of how far back his erection can comfortably go.

The second variation for the man’s position comes down to his leg placement.

Are his legs spread wide and low (around the woman’s waist?).. are they closer together by her upper body… or are they straight out as close to his head as possible?

Again, each variation makes a huge difference in the sensations you both feel as well as the comfortable tilt in his penis.

Now, let’s take a look at variations in the woman’s position.

She can kneel, be on her feet, or have one knee and one foot grounded.

She can face her man, face sideways, or face away from him.

She can be straight up, leaning away from him or leaning over him.

There are an endless number of ways to enjoy the amazon sex position.

Again, the key is to find the variation that works for you and your partner.

Step 3. Know your role and play it!

Now that you’ve gotten into the right mindset and found your ideal position, play your role.

Guys, being submissive is not about being “less than” or being dictated to… it’s about letting go of control and putting all your focus on the sensations that you’re woman is making you feel.

Allow yourself to fully FEEL whatever emotions and sensation come up for you.

If you start to judge or label what you’re feeling IE: “This is emasculating” or “This isn’t right, I’m the man. I need to take charge”… let that go.

Stop thinking.

Get back to feeling.

Enjoy the sensations.

Enjoy the fact that your woman is taking control of your (and her) pleasure.

Ladies, you’re in control here so play it up a bit.

Lead.

Show your man how much you want him and how he makes you lose control.

Pin his hands down.

If he tries to touch you or move you in a way other than what you truly want, slap his hand away and tell him that you’re the boss.

Let him know that you’re in charge, not just with your actions, but also your words.

Talk dirty to him.

Tell him you’re in charge.

Tell him how good it feels when you ride him.

This is what the amazon sex position is all about.

Remember, his erection can only bend so far back comfortably and when you’re in the heat of the moment, it can be easy to lose sight of this.

So make sure you establish a safe word before using this position and if he ever uses it, respect it immediately, ease up on the pressure and stop right away until you know what the problem is.

When you’re done in this position, give your man some aftercare and make sure he knows this was just a role you were playing.

Maybe return to a male-dominant position and let him return to taking the lead.

Finally, have fun!

Don’t set high expectations.

Like any position, the amazon sex position isn’t for everyone.

You might tumble.

You might not find the perfect version.

Don’t worry about it.

Laugh it off and get into another, easier female-dominant position like cowgirl.